The Wrestling Podcast, Episode 15: Trey Irby

1-2-3 Kid A

Trey Irby of Wrestling Theory joins the podcast this week to talk about SummerSlam, Vladimir Kozlov and the other future endeavorees, why preseason college football polls are useless, being the only guy in town who isn't indoctrinated into the blood cult that is college football fandom and his problem with Dave Lagana co-opting the Kevin Steen sign on RAW for himself. There are also a lot of weird segues and a lot of cheap plugs, which make for some comedy. Enjoy!

Direct link for your downloading pleasure

Your Midweek Links: A Massive Missive

NOMNOMNOMNOM

It's hump day, so here are some links to get you through the rest of the week!

Self-Shilling:

- The Wrestling Podcast with Spencer Hall, where he describes CM Punk as antisocial, Les Miles as unaffected and college football in the South as a "blood cult". [Episode 14: Tiny Luchas: Songs from the Mexican Gift Shop]

- My Camel Clutch Blog post last week, in praise of Mike Quackenbush's international approach with Chikara. [Chikara: An Education in International Wrestling]

- More podcasty goodness, this time with Jason Mann discussing Booker T vs. The Rock at SummerSlam, and a not-so-heated debate on the merits of Shane McMahon [Wrestlespective Radio]

Wrestling Links:

- "Punk wrestles so some day so that one day, he won't have to." [Fair to Flair]

- Justin Henry writes a paean to the most unsung bad guy in WWE today, Super Dave Osbourne. Wait, what? [Wrestling News Source]

- NWA Fanfest recap [South Atlanta Wrestling]

- DDS' Leslie interviews Marti Belle [Dirty Dirty Sheets]

- ...and Sidekick Andrew talks up SHIMMER with Dave Prazak. [Wrestlegasm]

- Five good things about Hardcore Justice... even Stephen T. Stone admits this was a hard hurdle to jump [Grapple Kingdom]

- A more fleshed-out look at the show. [The Harrison Analysis]

- Impact is so bad, even hip-hop/music blogs call them out on how bad they are [The Smoking Section]

- A lamentation on the treatment of the Impact TV Title [Camel Clutch Blog]

- Ken Patera no-selling the piledriver... a big deal back then. [Kentucky Fried Rasslin]

- Spear through a flaming table? Spear through a flaming table. [Musings of a Mark]

- Technically, this isn't a wrestling post, but it's a post by an honest-to-God wrestler in Dolph Ziggler about his hockey guilty pleasures. [Puck Daddy]

- A reasoned post about why the low rating Monday isn't exactly the end of the world. [International Object]

- Pictures from the Teen Choice Awards, here because John Cena, The Miz, Maryse and most importantly, Maryse's breasts showed up. Again, I'm all for gender equity and women being treated as equals and such, but I'm a guy, and I like breasts. Don't kill me for this. Please. [With Leather]

- The Best and Worst of RAW, 8/8... you know the drill [With Leather]

- Razor's RAW Live Blog [Kick-Out!! Wrestling]

- More thoughts on RAW [Hitting the Mark]

- Lucha libre beer pong set? Lucha libre beer pong set. [Hugging Harold Reynolds]

- Steve Austin fanning the flames of speculation on a possible match with CM Punk at WrestleMania [Cageside Seats]

- Melina butthurt over a line Beth Phoenix said in character Monday. In other news... water is wet, but not nearly as "wet" as other liquids. Sorry, had to work in SOME engineering/science humor here. [Diva Dirt]

- #IWantIrby [Wrestling Theory]

- Michelle Beadle is cute, loves sports and is a wrestling fan. Okay, why is it she's not getting more and more love from the wrestling nerd community? [I Want Wrestling]

- Lucha .gifs of amazement! [Luchablog]

Jamie Dobson Interviews:

- Dom "The Bomb" Vitelli

- Magical Jarek 1:20

- "The Joverine" Joey Knight

Non-Wrestling Links:

- Patton Oswalt's latest 5 second film. I love these. [5 Second Films]

- House of PUNTE's "Best of" podcast. A must listen for people who don't listen to it but want to get into it. [House of PUNTE]

- Rioting in London... I think the reaction of natives over there calling these rioters the pejorative term for the female genitalia is the appropriate response. I mean, really, you're against police brutality so you loot small businesses? [Uproxx]

- Ron Artest going to play in England. I'd make a joke about the riots, but it'd probably really bad that it'd come off as tasteless, so I'll pass. [The Smoking Section]

- A review of America's first pizzeria, Lombardi's in New York [Doughboys]

- The origin of General Tso's chicken. Stoners everywhere should try to read this origin of one of their staple foods until they get distracted by Nyan Cat in their other tab. [Mental Floss]

- What was omitted? The 78 comment follow-up where everyone flames everyone. [Imgur Gallery]

- This is my reason to wake up and look forward to Monday mornings. Drew Magary's weekly FJMing of Peter King is soul satisfying. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

- Best of the Conde Elevator Twitter account... yes, people are REALLY that self absorbed. [Buzz Feed]

- A sabermetric argument for why a guy like Ben Zobrist is more valuable to a team than Prince Fielder, even though the latter's counting/average stats are better. [Fan Graphs]

- An open letter to the makers of Cracker Jack [The Oatmeal]

- Texas A&M to stay where they are because buildings are heavy and hard to move, dammit [Every Day Should Be Saturday]

- How to spot authentic Cohibas from fakes [30nothings]

- 16 drinks named for authors and books. Not included is the Alan Moore Watchmen shot, which oddly enough is just a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head. [Slosh Spot]

- More alcoholic goodness, only constructive! Why the beer can is making a comeback. [Philadelphia Craft Beer Examiner]

- Jason Momoa writes Conan the Barbarian fan fiction? Well, he's still Khal Drogo to me, so it's all good. [Film Drunk]

- Best fictional workplaces. Not listed: The Isengard Uruk-Hai foundry. [Pajiba]

- Gollum as a ring bearer. Best. Wedding. Ever. [Topless Robot]

- Nothing is written in stone, says the placard written in stone. [Skull Swap]

- Frances Bean Cobain all grow'd up. All of a sudden, Nevermind is only the second best thing Kurt Cobain ever produced. [Jezebel]

- Anne Hathaway as Selina Kyle for the first time. Nice. [Blast-o-Rama]

- Making it rain while driving is a bad idea. [Gawker]

- The JAWS/Peanuts mash-up you weren't expecting but will probably love anyway. [NYMag - Vulture]

- Ralph Wiggum .gifs for the whole family! [Mmmm... Simpsons]

- Dana White gives out bounties for guys who take out guys in speedos. Part of me finds this dumb because of all the dick-punching, but part of me wants Dana White to patrol the beaches to take out banana hammocks there too. [Cagewriter]

- Cliff Lee does it all. [The Fightins]

- Portal etiquette [Pants Are Overrated]

- Shipping cars in the King Solomon-approved way [Carpe Diem]

- Things are so bad in Somalia that even the Prime Minister has to work two jobs! [NYMag - Daily Intel]

- Haha, they're making a Gen. Patton cologne. [Holy Taco]

- What if the NBA went tits up? [Deadspin]

- The Canadian Stampede was a rodeo before it was a WWF PPV, and it's still a big Calgary tradition today. [Grantland]

- If Ocarina of Time were a children's book... [Unreality Mag]

- Zune HD review [Aggressive Art]

- Barney Frank ripped one on the air. It's funny because he's old. [Warming Glow]

- Rex Grossman says the Redskins will win the NFC East. In other news... y'know what, I'm not going to tempt fate here, because the last thing I need are mouthy Skins fans throwing this back in my face in December if Grossman turns out to be right. [The 700 Level]

- Movie cliches, in graph form! [Graph Jam]

- The password? brettfavreBOOMtinactin [Hugging Harold Reynolds]

- Five more secrets that only two living people know [Cracked]

- I want to go to The Sharper Image with Ruben Amaro [I Want to Go to the Zoo with Roy Halladay]

- Looking at the most infamous trade in hockey history 23 years later [Puck Daddy]

- Star Wars porn parody... I dunno, I think I'd rather see the one that they were going to do in Zack and Miri Make a Porno than this one. [Gamma Squad]

- Your guide to fantasy football wide receivers, as compared to hot sitcom daughters from the '80s. Not compared to: Kimmy Gibler [With Leather]

- Why you shouldn't get your opinion from pundits [Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal]

OF COURSE CM Punk Was Involved in the Best Contract Signing Ever

Tense negotiations
Photo Credit: WWE.com

So did anyone else cringe when they announced a contract signing for the Undisputed WWE Championship match for SummerSlam? I did a little bit. Contract signings as a rule seem to follow a formula. Guys promo on each other, they sign the contract, then there's a pull-apart brawl. It's predictable, which in and of itself isn't a problem, but the execution is rarely ever done well. I can think of one contract signing off the top of my head that was done well enough to justify it, and it was the one between Batista and Rey Mysterio back in late 2009/early 2010 (I'm a bit fuzzy on when it happened). So yeah, the bar is set low to begin with.

Then last night happened, and of course CM Punk was at the epicenter of it. It's not like they deviated from the formula though. Punk and John Cena cut promos on each other, and at the end, there was a pull-apart brawl. It was all in the execution. Punk knows what buttons to push, and he has such a natural flair for working situations to get the maximum crowd reactions. It shone through again last night, with him defending himself from accusations from Triple H and Cena that he was the one who was the phony and continuing to tread the edge very finely, giving shout outs to Internet favorites such as Vladimir Kozlov₁ and Chris Masters (and Harry Smith, although really, he was never an Internet favorite and he was a guy who WANTED to leave to do MMA).

But let's not give credit to Punk alone here. Cena made this work as well. It wasn't just because he went meta either. I do admit though, Cena knowingly nodding to his detractors on the web was surreal, because you don't expect John Cena, Company Man, to mention terms like workrate or heel on camera. What I was more impressed with was again, his serious, moral hero delivery. When you combine that with Punk's voice for the voiceless narrative, you get something special.

I think the capper was that neither Cena nor Punk really came to blows with each other either. It was teased, but John Laurinitis and Triple H served purposes here other than to annoy the shit out of me. Well, Johnny Ace didn't do anything to annoy me, but Trips' interruptions were really uncalled for. But then again, maybe that's the point? Maybe it's foreshadowing a heel turn that will cement him fully as Mr. McMahon for a new generation? As much as his butting in was frustrating in the moment, I'm willing to give it a shot because hey, out of the last eight weeks in this feud, only one has been a dud, so maybe they're on the right track here.

So last night's final segment proved a couple of things to me. One is that the right talent can make even the most tired and lame-sounding of segments become must-see TV. Two is that the writers really are superfluous to the whole narrative. It's guys who know how to work crowds. It's Punk, Cena and to an extent, Triple H. That's where your bread and butter is.

1 - Am I playing fast and loose by calling Kozlov an Internet favorite? Maybe looking at everything macrohistorically, but at least in recent weeks, people have been gravitating around him from where I sit.

Instant Feedback: Triple H Is Solar Powered

Any momentum that was lost last week from the main angle was regained. Why did we have any doubt? Did we think the soul-sucking WWE machine could take CM Punk and rob him of his ability to entrance crowds? Turns out the answer to that is now. Punk, who got loud reactions from an iffy crowd all night, a crowd that faded in and out all night long, showed that he can curry interest for a wrestling match by opening his mouth, not by holding a belt up to new theme music.

And let's not take credit away from Cena. He went meta at one point, mentioning workrate in his nerdy voice, and that was great from a different standpoint, but the rest of his delivery showed him at his best. He needs to be the strong, moral, lawful good voice that counterbalances the Punk who's chaotic good persona draws in the male fans who like people who like to watch the world burn. The WWE could really be onto something if they cultivate a split fanbase and start exploring the fact that different wrestlers appeal to different demographics.

They'd also be wise to have Triple H play as much of a background role as possible. Of course, his forced star turn tonight couldn't come at a worse time in terms of selfish reasons, as I'm planning a bunch of entries that look to reconcile my past as a wrestling fan re: Trips, and if I end up coming to a conclusion that forgives him and he ends up fucking up SummerSlam? Yeah, I don't even want to imagine that. Triple H as a forefront character for this angle is bad. As someone in the background, he works, especially if he lets Funkhauser, err, I mean Super Dave Osbourne, err, I mean John Laryngitis... err, Laurinitis become the real lightning rod proxy. It also helps that Mr. Ace has a puro education, because I doubt that flash kick from Punk was the last bump he'll be taking.

Of course, the perfect contract signing wasn't the only thing going on here. A lot of stuff happened on RAW tonight, including two potential SummerSlam matches being taken off the card. The first saw Miz continue Rey Mysterio's injury angle with a STELLAR beatdown. Again, he shows why he's the best at the Pearl Harbor, bar none. Obviously, since Rey will be back next week for his rematch, it lends credence to the report that his injury is just a "tweak". The other match taken off the books potentially has been R-Truth/John Morrison. Some have been speculating that it's a warning shot to go along with Melina's firing. It makes sense to me, but again, no primary source, no reporting as fact. That being said, with those two matches being moved off the card ostensibly, is it too much to ask to see Miz and Truf win the Tag Pennies and become JeriShow 2K11 at SummerSlam? Please?

This was a banner night for promos. Alberto del Rio's spot before his match with Punk was pretty good. Truf was hilarious as always. Punk's line of "Triple H needing the spotlight so much that he's solar powered" was GOLD, JERRY, GOLD. Of course, the wrestling was good for the most part too. Cena/Swagger was good. Kofi/Truth was deceptively excellent. After a week where they may have taken off, RAW bounced back with a strong show, one that gives me hope that maybe, just maybe, they won't fuck up SummerSlam.