Monday, June 13, 2011
If you had Acne in the 10th grade you are probably cool now. If you didn’t have Acne in the 10th grade you are probably a balding loser now. Some of us flourish during our teen years, whereas some of us struggle to keep our head above water. Some of us are pimps whereas the greater majority are nervous to even initiate conversation with a person of the female (from my perspective) or male persuasion. It’s not easy being a teen, and the guys who had it easy make it look so appealing. Fortunately, Acne riddled years filled with teenage angst come to an end, and for the youngsters who had it the toughest, the teenage years are typically valleys in a life dominated with peaks. Acne and awkward are battle scars, and we all know that to excel you must be battle tested. We all love to watch cinema where the little guy triumphs over Goliath: Gladiator, Rocky, Pineapple Express and Kung Fu Panda illuminate this point like the Big-Dipper lights up the sky on a cloudless night. If you, like I, were riddled with back-ne, strange craters around your mouth and painful poppers on your forehead, then you are most likely beginning the twilight of your career and life. (That is assuming you were born between 1985 and 1990) You did not peak in high school, like the guy who had access to his parent’s car and avoided an awkward teenage stage all together. But you’ve experienced the rigours of an acne-induced awkward adolescence and this is what will catapult you too becoming a grounded and most likely youthful looking handsome as fuck adult. A couple years of physical hardship set you up for the remainder of your lifespan. You’ll be the 80 year old with the 60 year old mistress as well as the freshest grandpa or grandma on the lawn bowling circuit. You will have earned your looks and taken your lumps and bumps, learned a thing or two, and for that, you have Acne to thank.